The Best Christmas Present

I've always heard stories about women who didn't know they were pregnant until they started having symptoms, or they were a week late, or they felt a little "off". As someone who was religiously taking pregnancy tests every month as soon as I possibly could, I never understood these women. Not until I became one of them.

For 2 years we've been trying to have a baby. The first few months we weren't too concerned about it, I mostly went off of birth control because I thought it was making me sick, which I later found out I was sick due to my Cyclical Vomiting Syndrome. But we figured that we were ready to have a baby and if it happened it happened, if it didn't it didn't. During this time I only took pregnancy tests if I was late, or sick. I never expected a positive pregnancy test, but after a few months I got one. We were shocked, and thrilled, but it turned out to be a false positive. That really changed things for us. We didn't know how badly we had wanted this until we thought we had it. We kept trying, and after the first year we got more serious about it. I was taking ovulation tests every single month, and I never once got a positive result. Normally we would have gone to see a fertility doctor at this point, but we were in Arkansas for most of this time and we didn't want to start any fertility stuff knowing we were only there temporarily. When we got back to Arizona, I found a fertility clinic, scheduled an appointment, and spent 2 hours filling out all the paperwork. We took a deep breath and realized that this was no longer in our hands, but we were ready to take the next step.

We got settled back in Tucson, and then took off to spend time at the Ranch and in Utah for Christmas. We had a great time in Utah, we were able to celebrate Christmas with my family, see Rick's family, and spend time with friends. We left on the 23rd so we could spend Christmas Eve and Christmas with Rick's family at the ranch, and that was amazing as well. The day after Christmas we were ready to go back to Tucson. I was helping Rick's mom pick up some toys off the ground and I bent over to pick one up, stood back up, and felt like I had just completed a triathlon. I was so out of breath and had to sit down. On our drive back to Tucson I was feeling nauseous. and I told Rick he needed to pull over so I could throw up. When I got back in the car I said "My CVS has been under control for almost a year...I think I'm pregnant." We both didn't believe the words I said, just because we've thought the same thing before and it was never true. When we got back to our apartment, I had 2 pregnancy tests left from months prior and decided to take one. As I sat there holding the test in my hand staring at the 2 bright pink lines my first thought was "That's weird...why are there 2 lines? This test must be broken." It took me a good minute to realize what two lines meant. Once it hit me that this was a positive result I couldn't keep back the tears. I showed Rick and he said "I'll believe it when a Doctor tells me it's true." That brought me back to reality quickly. We had been here before with a positive pregnancy test in our hands and hope in our hearts and it turned out not to be true. We decided to take more pregnancy tests and if we got a bunch of positives then maybe it was real. Rick went to the store and came back with more tests. After the 5th positive result, he laughed, and we cried, but we still needed a Doctor to tell us it was real. I ended up taking 8 home pregnancy tests. Every single one was positive.

I found a Doctor here and made an appointment. We were able to be seen the next week. The appointment was very routine - urine test, blood work, medical history. I told my Doctor that we had a false positive home pregnancy test before and we needed to know if the blood work showed I was actually pregnant. She told me that my urine test was positive and that they wouldn't know the results of the blood test for a few days. She also looked at me like I was crazy since I had taken 8 home pregnancy tests but still doubted if I was actually pregnant. By this point my all day sickness was in high gear so I knew that either I was really pregnant or something was seriously wrong with me, but I still needed a Doctor to tell me "Yes, you are pregnant." I think Rick needed it more than I did. I hate that the false positive robbed us of that initial feeling of excitement and hope.

A few days later I called my Doctors office and asked for the results of my blood work. They told me "Everything looks great." So I said "So, I'm really pregnant?" The girl on the phone was really caught off guard by that question and said "Uhhhhhmmmm....yes" like I was a moron, but it was what we needed to hear. Finally it was real. I was really pregnant. Holy crap - we're going to have a baby.

I had an ultrasound scheduled for the next week to determine how far along I was. I thought I was 6ish weeks along, my Doctor thought I was 7ish weeks along. I was nervous going into that appointment, and I prayed there would be a heartbeat. As soon as she put the ultrasound wand on my belly that baby appeared on the screen, it wiggled, stopped, and then waved it's hand at us. We both cried, and Rick couldn't stop laughing. He was sitting by my feet and he was too far away to be able to hold my hand so he kept saying "Can I hold your feet? I need to hold you. Let me hold your feet." And he held onto my feet and we cried as we heard that strong heartbeat. She measured the baby and said "You are right on schedule - 8 weeks along." I had no idea I was that far along, and we had only found out 2 weeks earlier. Everything became even more real after that ultrasound.  We are having a baby.

We decided not to get each other anything for Christmas this year because we were going to be going to Utah. We ended up with the best Christmas present we could have ever asked for. Baby Brimhall - our Christmas Miracle.