Hijacked

Pregnancy Expectation:

Pregnancy Reality:

For nearly 25 years I've learned how to deal with my body. I've known how it works, what it needs, what it likes, what makes it feel better when it's sick, and overall how it functions day to day. In the last 14 weeks that has all changed drastically. My body has been hijacked by something so cute and tiny and it's changing everything. My body is no longer mine. Sometimes sharing is hard.

These are some of the symptoms I've experienced over the last 14 weeks. This isn't all of them, these are only the ones I'm not too embarrassed to openly discuss.

• All day sickness - I don't know who decided to call it "morning sickness" but they are a liar. I didn't actually think I would be one of those few lucky women who didn't have to deal with this. I have a weak stomach and get sick easily, so I figured I would be sick during pregnancy, but this is a whole new level of sick. This is nausea and vomiting like I've never ever experienced. It is violent and horrific. It makes me pee my pants, pops blood vessels in my eyes, and gives me bloody noses. It starts when I wake up and ends when I fall asleep. I tried every remedy I could and nothing worked, and my doctor gave me 4 different medications to try and nothing worked. Finally after a trip to the Emergency Room they gave me a shot of phenergan and so far it has been the only thing that helps. Thankfully, the nausea and vomiting has slacked off over the last week, affecting me now only every other day or every few days. My hope is that it continues to die down as I progress in my pregnancy.
• Fatigue - I am tired. Always. And I can easily sleep for 16 hours a day, and sometimes I do. This pregnancy has been difficult, but I am so so so so blessed that I don't have to work right now. Honestly, there would be no way I could do it. I am so lucky that Rick has such a good job that allows me to stay home and take care of myself. 
• Dizziness - The first 2 weeks after I found out I was pregnant this was one of my worst symptoms. I could do nothing except for lay down and close my eyes, unless I was throwing up. I would lay in bed and if I would shift at all it felt like I was on a roller coaster. This did not help with the nausea. Luckily I discovered sea band bracelets and when I wear them I'm not dizzy.
• Shortness of Breath - This was really bad in the beginning and isn't as bad now, except for the one time last week that I was carrying in groceries and had to stop every 10 steps to catch my breath. You should see me walk up stairs.
• Rash - Every time I throw up I get a rash all over my face, chest, and arms. Super sexy.
• Lightning Crotch - This is a real thing. Google it. Or maybe don't, that could be dangerous. It's where suddenly you feel like someone hit you in the crotch with a metal bat. The only thing that makes it stop is to rub the affected area. I hate it when this happens, especially at church.
• Excess Saliva - You guys, this is so gross. Suddenly my saliva glands are working double time. But the worst part is that my saliva is basically poison. If I swallow it I will throw up, so I have to spit it out, but that is gross so it makes me throw up either way.
• Sweaty Teeth - This is different from excess saliva, and the best way to explain it is that my teeth are sweaty. Basically I get thick gooey stuff only on my teeth and it tastes like a dumpster. I've heard that pregnancy makes plaque on your teeth worse, but this is so much grosser than just excess plaque.
• Heartburn - Every time I eat popsicles I get heartburn. How does that even make sense?
• Limbs Falling Asleep - My arms, legs, toes, and fingers all fall asleep so easily.
• Fainting - I haven't actually fainted yet, but I've come close 3 times. Luckily Rick is a good catch and he just lays me down quickly before I actually pass out. 
• Canker Sores -  Every day when I wake up I think "Did I get new braces put on yesterday?" I have never had canker sores this bad in my life. My mouth is covered, and as a result I no longer drink Orange Juice.
• Body Odor - Good hell. I smell like a 15 year old boy after wrestling practice. I don't even do anything all day so I don't know where this is coming from. It was really bad for a while there but luckily it's starting to go away. Either that or the toxic scent has burned my sense of smell and I'll be one of those people who stinks but doesn't know they stink.
• Cravings - These haven't been too bad yet. They were worse earlier on which was weird because I'd be puking and in between heaves I'd think "Wow watermelon sounds so good right now." One time my friend posted a picture of chicken and waffles on instagram and I couldn't stop thinking about it for like 6 hours and I finally woke Rick up at 3am and begged him to take me to IHOP. He took me, even though he had work that day. He's the best.
• Emotional capacity of a Toddler - I was crying when I was begging Rick to take me to IHOP.

Overall, pregnancy has been hard. But I wouldn't change it. We wanted this for a long time, and I know that each horrible symptom means my body is working hard to keep my baby safe. Women get pregnant and have babies so often that I don't think people realize just how amazing it is. It takes a million things going right to create a healthy little person. It's amazing. It is a miracle. No wonder I feel awful, my body is doing something awesome.

And on the days when I feel really horrible, the only thing that has actually helped is to watch this video over and over. Seriously, it's actually made my nausea go away. Pretty amazing.